Tuesday 12 May 2015

maybe it wasen't always like that

so , yesterday. i was sitting there in the courtyard of my top London theological collage drinking my Starbucks and talking through the list of questions my friends and i had been given to go through for the session (our tutor  had let us take class outside because we where in discussion groups and the weather was nice) 

when it hit me . 

when did i become that person that people look at and get jealous of what looks like there perfect little life.

it was brief , but i saw the look i got given by one of the people passing by me on the street

i know the look because i used to give enough of them myself. the "ugg i wish i was that lucky" look and the they dont know how good they have it" look

it made me wonder just how many people i gave that look to in the past had , just like me . clawed my way to where they are. 

maybe it wasn't always like that for them , i don't know their story

i always imaged the people i saw with life's i envied as these spoiled self entitled brats that wouldn't know hardship if it came up and hit them round the face. and for some reason i never once imaged them appreciating what they had 

i just want to say. to the lady that looked like she wished she had it easier when she saw me.

i promise hasn't always been this easy
i promise i don't take it for granted , not for a single second 

you made me realize i am now on the other side of that spectrum and its the most surreal experience ever 
i promise i will do everything i can to give back

and i hope you get to experience the same feeling i did yesterday one day 

lots of love 
Lauren  
xxx


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