a challenge to myself

yesterday i realized that i haven't posted on this blog in a while , my bad

so, i have decided that i am going to challenge myself

and its you guys that are going to reap the benefits (i hope)

my challenge to myself is to blog once a week for you guys. 

talking about quotes , random streams of conciseness where i just ramble on or general life updates 

this blog is for you guys as much as it is for me 

so , the blog will most probably go up on a Saturday afternoon. 

honestly i have no idea what i am going to write about every week though ... so that's where you come in. please leave in the comments here or in the ts forum  what you would like to see me talk about it could be something you want me to talk about that you haven't seen in the blog yet or you what me to elaborate on something i have already addressed     

toddles 

Lauren 

xxx

when 3000 words looks like Everest

sooooo being a degree student is complexly amazing 

and sucks at the same time 

i have now had 2 3000 word essays to complete

spoiler alert ... i survived , just

the first essay wasn't to bad . i had a bit of a rough time with organizing my thoughts but hay that's to be totally expected from a dyslexic with turners syndrome right.

anyways , to cut a long story short. 

i handed the first one in on time . amazed at how i had handled it ...

then i got the feedback and i quote this to you now 

"your spelling and grammar where so poor this did not feel like an academic essay"

excuse me ! i had it checked 3 times by someone who can spell perfectly well. so i have no idea how that comment is even possible , anyway , i digress.

although i was amazingly happy that i passed . that comment hit me , and hard 

so when i came to writing my second essay all i could here was that comment.

and some of you will be able to relate to this. i got that familiar feeling in the pit of my stomach like it was all useless and hay i am going to fail anyway so why am i even trying.

newsflash people. you cant fail if you don't stop trying...

so after about 3 weeks of getting little bits of this essay done i had reached the grand total of 1236 words. (that's less than half way) 

i felt like an explorer. ide gotten half way up the mountain. but the summit just seamed well ... unattainable

and just when i felt defeated the devil did his favorite thing .... kicked me while i was down.

a friend of mine started to write her essay. 3 weeks after i had , and caught up with me inn the space of 4 hours 

i was devastated. i know that sounds a strange thing to say " i was devastated my friend was owning her essay"

being held back by learning difficulty's sucks

being held back by turners syndrome sucks ... 

but then it hit me 

the fact she had caught me up did not take away from the fact i had got that far also 

i was on track and i finished on time 

the thing about having ts and dyslexia is. it can only hold you back if you let it

if you work as hard as you work smart ...

you can climb Everest , or in my case .... kick the crap out of a 3000 word essay 

because guess what ...its done ,  not only is it done 

its not due until the 27th ...   

like i said. it cant hold you back unless you let it. 

and i for one am not about to let it .... and i come armed with a mickey mouse notepad 

 

as someone i love very much put it ... " giving an academic f you to the drs was never going to be easy loz , go do it anyway"

but that's only half the point. yes i would love to prove them wrong but

 one of my favorite you tubers reminded me in a tweet earlier today "don't do things to prove others wrong. do things to prove yourself right"

proving myself right is going to be so much more satisfying 

so guys , i know a lot of you who read this have ts. don't ever let it get in your way. ever.

and watch how quickly you turn peoples heads when you live a life way cooler than you ever imaged or had been told possible

if i listened to drs. i wouldn't be walking or talking or having any quality of life .... if i was here at all

so go conquer your Everest ... maybe even the literal Everest

your legs might hurt on the way up ,but i promise you

the view from the top 

is spectacular 

toddles

Lauren 

xxx

     

  

  

  

2013:a recap

so i thought i would look back at my Facebook posts of 2013 and have a recap in a blog post. i think im going to make this a yearly thing ,the idea of this blog is for me to look back see how much i have grown as a person. in more detail than Facebook or twitter can give me so here goes...

January ..  

2013 started with a near on 3 week bout of snow

Me " alf , I'm moving away from this coversation. I'm going to be the bigger person". Alf "but your not the bigger person are you short stack" lol got to love my brother !

Alfie had his sass pants on that day ! haha 

So angry at myself right now ! I was on my way home from work on the bus and as we pass st johns church I hear a girl behind me say " you know I would like to go to a church service , just to see if god is actually there" to which her friend bust out laughing and said "don't be stupid of course he's not" and I know I should have totally stuck up for the big man hear but instead I found myself staring strait ahead and hoping they hadn't hered enough of the music blaring out of my headphones to figure out it was worship. All because this girl was like double my size and she scared me. Then just to make me feel so much better about bottling it like a cowered as I got of the bus god puts the story of David and Goliath on my heart *face palm*

and the moment i didn't have faith 

email from St mulitus collage INTERVIEW ON 4TH OF FEB AAAAAAAAGGG SO PLEASED !!!!!!!!

and the moment i did

nothing like seeing Joel Newall do the actions to "our god is a grate big god" to brighten up your Thursday  lol , awsome

and the moment you get some comic relief at work 

FEBUERY .. 

I GOT IN TO ST MILIEUS COLLAGE *dose the happy dance*    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

biggest change in 2013 was becoming a theology student 

MARCH...

So tomorrow is mothers day.i don't mention my mum not being around that much but I'm going to now. The only thing Worse than having a dead mum around mothers day is having a mum that is out there somewhere that doesn't give a crap.but tomorrow I have a choise I can either mope about the fact I have no "real" mum or I can celebrate the amazing women how have helped make me the women I am so hear goes — with Caroline Cousins and 9 others.

the moment i was totally over seeing mushy mothers day statuses and made one for all the people who where in the same boat as me 

  Family over from canada  yaaay x — with Nicola Malone.

i had two and a half solid weeks of family time 

APRIL...

i don't agree with anything remotely conservative when it comes to politics. but Mrs Thatcher had a hard job to do. and no one can say she didn't do it , she was also the first women prime minister , that takes some doing. all in all, she was an inspirational women. r.i.p Margret Thatcher

may...

go feast. such beautiful grounds 

 something i shared . still very true 

June ..

rip Callum Reilly  gonna miss you buddy

we miss you man

July ..

Celebrating a good friend's baptism ! Happy Jesus birthday Katie. Your an awesome sister in Christ x — with Katie Carter-Leay.

summer was absolutely blistering hot this year . so this BBQ for my friends baptism was awesome 

august ..

i had the honer of being a bridesmaid at my friends wedding on august 9th

Had such an amazing time at soul survivor I couldn't write a status long enough to do it justice so I will just say this ..... God never fails to go immeasurably beyond my expectations. Thank you to all the people who made it special. Sorry if I miss someone when tagging — with Joel Newall and 15 others.

Back from momentum. Tiered , soooo grateful for a shower that I don't have to line up for and compleatly amazed at how much god was doing in peoples lives... Wow , just wow.

and spent the rest of august at camp

September ..

"The British Dating Etiquette"-- as told by Lauren Malone I LOVE THIS!!!

teaching an american how things are done around here

October..

my aunts wedding 

today's mission : a 500 word introduction to an essay entitled "can you do mission using only one of scripture, tradition, reason or experience?" #biblenerdcollage

and the essays kicked in

Casually discussing the differences between Jesus and superman — with Chloe Painter.

and  so did the beautiful friendships 

At a cardiology appointment in the London heart hospital After seeing half of London whilst looking for westmorland street which coincidentally none knows.

a status from one of the thousands of hospital visits 

Even when it gets crappy, you just gotta think of the positive, you know what i mean ? You can't let the crappy get you down. You gotta go through the crap. You put on your big boots and just walk through that crap and go like "screw you crap, your just crap and I'm gonna walk through you"

here is me trying to force myself out of a bad day .. the comments on this status helped exponentially 

November..

o the accomplishment this blue box brings !!

our weekend away. such a great time just hanging out with friends 

December ..

It's at times like this.,Having just spent the weekend with some of the most incredible friends ever, that I realise how much I truly have to be grateful for. Thank you everyone who made this weekend so awesome — with Chloe Painter and 9 others.

a reflection on a weekend that made me remember why i love my job and friends so much

At the pub celebrating the end of my first term as a youth ministry student after Casually reading psalm 50 to the arch bishop of Canterbury this morning #dayinthelife

this was one of those days that you don't realize is going to be one of your favorite days ever until its over

to all you Dr who think having ts and dyslexia is gonna stop me getting a degree... stick my third in your pipe and smoke it ! First essay passed !!!!

yep its been a year of so many successes

Sitting here in the new onsie "Santa" got me as my early present. W aching the poler express and drinking hot chocolate before midnight mass. Feeling super festive. Merry Christmas everyone

Christmas celebration to finish the year off 

this year has been the first year where i am not looking down the barrel of major personal changes in such a long time. i have had what looks like a fairly average 2013 for a 19 year old. save the dam hospital visits. and that got me thinking , a year isn't made monumental by the circumstances you find yourself in. its about how you play the hand your dealt. and being able to look back and think. wow i came through that the best i could. i have grown , learned and become more resilient . i am who i am because of it. that works with good circumstances to. when you find yourself comfortable its easy to become complacent and apathetic towards your life but trust me, life's far to short to sit there and watch time as it speeds past you.  

so my prayer for myself and you guys as we get started with 2014. no matter what the circumstances you find yourself in. is that you would make the most of them. drink it in , look around at your life and change the things you don't like appreciate the things you do. and above all ... strive to be what Jesus is trying to make you.     

toodles 

lots of love 

Lauren 

xxx